Feeling Stuck? Here Is How To Get Unstuck In Life!

Gary Wilbers: Speaker, Coach, Author, Trainer > Blog > Feeling Stuck? Here Is How To Get Unstuck In Life!

“You can either be climbing or you can become stuck, the choice is up to you.”

Gary Wilbers

Mindset Shift

On November 18, 2002, I had a mindset change that altered my direction.  As I look back now, I realize 2002 was a turning point in my life.  I had been working with a business coach that year, and we started the process of planning the goals I wanted to achieve in 2003.  I asked my coach, “Why can’t I get myself to achieve the goal of losing weight?” I was a walking heart attack risk at 275lbs with a family of three small children and a growing business.  My coach responded with something I will never forget, “First, you need to schedule your training just as you do any other appointment.”  He said, “Let me ask you a question.  Do you miss an appointment if you have it scheduled?”  I replied, “No, unless an emergency comes up.”  He said, “That is the way you need to respond to your training sessions.”  Then he picked up the phone, talked to someone at the gym, and scheduled my orientation session for the next Tuesday at 6 A.M.  Then he said, “You must find an accountability partner to hold you responsible for attending your training sessions.”  He continued, “I will be your accountability partner until it becomes your new mindset.”  Each week I would let him know when I was scheduled for my training sessions.  After each session, I would call him, or he would call me for accountability.

BEFORE: Me overweight and unhealthy

After about three months he began to check with me weekly.  After six months it was a new habit and I had lost over 35 lbs.  By October 18, 2003, I had lost 75 lbs.  My new eating plan and exercising allowed me to accomplish my goal in eleven months.  I was in my mid-thirties when I did this, so my metabolism was stronger than it is today.  I am happy to report that after all these years, I have not only kept the weight off, but I have continued to improve my health.

AFTER: My weight loss and exercise


Mindset is defined as a particular way of thinking; a person’s attitude or set of opinions about something; a mental attitude or inclination or a fixed state of mind. Changing your mindset is not easy because it has been set over a period of time and the subconscious part of your brain will say no to the new mental thinking. It takes a powerful force for you to overcome this fixed state.  Can it be done? Of course, but you must create discipline with your new mindset and decide to make it your new way of thinking.  

The key objective I had to overcome was my mindset. When I changed my mindset to healthy eating and exercising, the results were amazing. We must realize our mindset has a direct impact on our results.   

The High Achiever Mindset

The High Achiever Mindset is a framework that started from a decision to lose some weight in order to be around for my children and to enjoy my life by being an active Dad. To really understand this framework, you need to evaluate your life as if you are simultaneously looking through a pair of glasses with two very different lenses.

Let’s title the left lens “your viewpoint.”  Ask yourself these questions:

  • How will I apply this to my life?
  • What changes do I need to implement to improve?
  • Who can help me become better in each of these areas?

The right lens is titled “leadership.” What do you want to portray to those who are important to you? Ask yourself how you show leadership in these four areas:

  • Energy
  • Connections
  • Influence
  • Integration

Am I helping others obtain what they are seeking? Am I willing to mentor others on their journey?

Do you see the difference? The left lens is all about you, and the right lens is all about others and what you bring to their life. When you view your life through these lenses, your actions, habits, and disciplines will change. 

When I speak about The High Achiever Mindset, I point out that usually, most individuals are in one of two mindsets: climber mindset or stuck mindset.  Let’s define these two types of mindsets.

Climber Mindset  

The climber mindset is searching to grow, learn, change, and become who you want to be. As the climber, you can change and grow no matter what stage of life you are in. In this mindset, you are always finding new ways to accomplish goals, and are willing to keep trying even when you fail.  You realize your ascension in life is about continuing to grow each day.

Stuck Mindset

The stuck mindset is never wanting to fail.  You always stay on the safe path, and you are unwilling to grow, learn, or change.  You talk about the past and why the future is never going to be any better. The stuck mindset always tells why it cannot be done. 

Which mindset are you in right now? The good news is you can create the climber mindset in your life. When we look first at ourselves, it allows us to visualize and internalize what we need to accomplish. The four pillars of energy, connection, influence, and integration then link us to the leadership we will need to share in each of these areas. Our choices, attitudes, habits, and disciplines will determine if we are truly showing leadership daily.

If you are struggling in your business reach out to me. I understand the daily challenges you face when running your business. I have over 30 years of experience running 12 successful businesses. That is why I started the Ascend Mastermind because it is my mission to help business owners succeed in business and life. 

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Make it a GREAT Day!

Gary Wilbers

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